Theresa Lear Levine picture

Resolving Stress from Buying, Selling or Building a Home

Today, we’re talking about resolving stress from buying, selling or building a home and how insanely helpful the practice of EFT was for me.

The last time I went through the home selling and buying process, it saved me!

I think I would have lost my ever-loving mind if I had not been so immersed in the practice at the time. You see the last time that we went through that I was actually getting my master level certification and EFT.

So I was really immersed in it. And it was also the beginning of the pandemic. There was a lot going on.

It was a really interesting time to both sell and buy a house. So let me back up a little bit here… (But I want to show you all the ways that we get in our own way with this. And the ways that tapping can help you ease through it just easier, for lack of a better way of putting it.)

So we called out a real estate agent and tried to get a toe dipped into the idea of when we want to sell our home, it was back in 2019.

They came out they told us all the things we would need to do to the house that we currently owned, in order to put it on the market, gave us an idea of the current market value, and what the process would look like. And I highly recommend doing that.

For anybody that is even thinking about selling their house because just like I’ve talked about any time before, in order for something to happen, it has to start as an idea.

And then you have to start taking action on that idea in order to start manifesting it. So even though we didn’t actually put that into motion until the summer of 2020, it was in the back of our minds.

In 2019, I really got into Marie Kondo and straightening and tidying up the house… we got rid of a crap ton of stuff!

We tackled a lot of projects that we had been putting off and it felt great!

Our house was organized, it felt like I’d gone through, I would say like 80 or 90% of the stuff that I wanted to know, we still had those like odd collections of things in our basement and storage that we’re going to take hours if not weeks or months to go through like things like when you think about organizing or selling a baseball card collection, or antiques or whatever that kind of stuff is where you’re like…

I don’t really know what to do with it or who to give it to or do I keep it?

Do I sell it?

How do I preserve it?

My wedding dress is still sitting in a garbage bag with chocolate on it from the cake and desserts that were served during the festivities.

It’s been a while since we were married in 2008. So I think those stains are staying and I think I’m okay with it.

I don’t have any girls that are going to want to wear it. But… who knows, maybe their brides will but I’m not counting on that.

And it is what it is.

Sometimes, I’m okay with letting go. And that’s all right.

But anyway, I got through the majority of what we really wanted to organize or get rid of the ways that we needed to kind of phase things out based on the kids that we had age that they were, and so on and so forth. Now at that time, also my youngest was Jewish.

There were some things that we were just literally done with at that point since we weren’t planning on having any more children.

So we were able to get rid of a lot.

It’s always interesting that when kids say they’re done with it, they truly get rid of it instead of storing it for the next one or somebody else or what have you.

So there’s a lot that goes out of our doors these days and especially then, so we spent that time doing that, and then it was like, spring. I remember the day even we went to the park.

We took a hike in a new park. I feel like it was June of 2020 and you know spring and Summer of 2020, we go visit all the parks go see all the places outdoors.

Because of the pandemic, there wasn’t a whole lot that was open. And we took a lot of nature walks. So we went to a new park, we took a hike. And on the way, I downloaded a whole map.

I don’t remember which one it was. And I was just looking at things that had recently sold in our neighborhood and general prices of things that might interest us as a family for where we wanted to move.

And that was the next step of the manifestation process. And I simply mentioned it. I was like “hey, why don’t we just put our house on the market and see what happens?” And because it’s really hard to think about moving if you don’t know what you can sell for.

It was a crazy market at that time, you know, things were going on the market for a day or so before they sold.

And that was only because people needed that day or so to consider all the offers that were coming in.

Everything was selling for over the market price. It was insane! So we both didn’t know… “hey, can we sell our house? What can we sell it for?” We want to move somewhere and rent while we figure out what we want to buy.

Is what we want to buy even out there right now? If so, will we be able to secure it based on the crazy bidding wars and things that were going on?

So it was a lot of if this than that.

That alone is a lot to tap on. Because you have to put yourself out there in order to make it happen.

It’s not like you can just go home shopping, find what you want and buy it if buying the home is contingent on selling the home that you’re in.

When all was said and done, from that date in mid-June, until the beginning of September, I believe September 1 or August 31 was when we actually settled on our home, it was 10 and a half weeks… During that time, we did massive amounts of home projects to the house that we were selling to get it ready from replacing countertops and sinks to painting cabinets, fixing appliances, straightening things, detail cleaning things, power washing thing landscaping…

All the things… every weekend and spare minute was spent doing something to get the home ready, we got one of those pod units and moved out pretty much anything and everything we didn’t need on a daily or weekly basis.

And things that we thought, “hey, we probably won’t need this until at least fall or winter. ” So if it was a holiday decoration for the winter, we put it in the pod. And we just got as much out of the house as possible.

I tell you what, if you’re somebody that is wanting to clean out, it’s a pretty cool process to go through. Because some of that stuff when it came out of the pod several months later, it was like “I don’t know if I need this anymore” And then it went straight to Goodwill or whatever, we didn’t even bother moving it into our basement.

But if you’re having trouble letting go of things, and you’re just not sure, put it somewhere out of the way for three months, six months a year. And then when you come back to it, see if you still care, see if you still want it. See if it still matters to you.

It’s a great way to know, without feeling like you’ve made a premature decision about the things that you have. So we got the pod. And we did all the projects. And in the meantime, we start looking at houses as soon as ours was roughly ready to go on the market. And, we put ours on the market.

We had half a dozen offers in hand, the weekend we put it on the market, which was great!

It meant that we only had to like get out of dodge and leave the house showing ready for one weekend. And then for the inspections and things thereafter, we started shopping for our house.

There was so much to go through emotionally just with selling the house, I can literally just do this episode on selling the house.

We loved our house. We loved our neighborhood, a great school district. Great home. We had been there since 2012.

We had replaced, fixed, and updated so much of what was there. But we were at the point where we knew that we wanted to redo the kitchen, we wanted to redo the bathrooms, we were getting into kind of big project territory.

We also felt like with four kids, we needed a little more space. It wasn’t a small home. We had six bedrooms, which was great because we used five of them for our family. Each kid had their own bedroom, we had our bedroom, and we had a guest room. It was great.

But living space-wise, it was beginning to feel a little crowded and we wanted more outdoor space. Again the pandemic was pretty inspiring for that, you know wanting a place for the kids to be able to frolic and do their thing when so much time is spent at home.

And I was growing my EFT business, which was all happening from home alongside my fitness and nutrition coaching business at that time.

All of that was happening out of our home, I wanted dedicated office space at the time I had taken over our dining room, literally, the dining room had become my office there was, and there was no dining room table in it to use anymore.

And that was fine because we really rarely used it. Especially again, during the pandemic. It’s not like we were hosting dinner parties.

But it wasn’t the configuration or the feel that we were looking for, ultimately, and both my husband and I knew that. So the next logical step was, let’s look around and see what else is out there.

Otherwise, let’s totally like build an addition here, revamp the different rooms that we want to revamp, and so forth.

We were looking at somewhere between, you know, 100 $150,000 worth of additions and renovations at least. So like, what if we just put that into another home and actually got what we wanted?

So we found things and in doing that whole process with selling our home and thinking about that, there’s a lot of memories that come up, you know, I brought babies home to that house, I have so many memories of raising my children in that house. And good times with my husband and family parties, we hosted all different things.

So there’s all that bittersweetness to tap on and to release. And to get a better understanding of, and just packing things up. The process of getting a home ready to sell basically requires you to de-personalize it.

When you have to take down your wedding pictures, your kid’s pictures, their artwork, repaint walls, that you painted a certain color because you love it. But the general public doesn’t like my orange bathroom and my bright green foyer, there’s a feeling of it not being okay to be you, or needing to cover things up.

There are feelings of shame that come up.

There are feelings of bittersweet laws that come up, there are all different feelings to process. And again, tapping was monumental for that. Absolutely.

Because that alone is enough to stop people, you come up against those memories and those feelings, and then you think I’ll just stay here forever.

And then I don’t have to leave those things. But at the end of the day, nothing lasts forever. So you might as well have things the way that you want, right? So, you know, I took pictures, I tapped I processed things.

And I knew that what I was looking for was greater for all of us than what we currently had. And that it was worth going through those emotions, and everything else.

Selling a home also requires a lot of quick decisions, a lot of high-dollar decisions, and a lot of ability to trust your intuition. I did a lot of intuition work during that time. And a lot of talking to the universe. Because as you begin to shop for homes, inevitably, almost anybody I talked to has the one that got away, right?

So we had one home that we totally fell in love with. And I could totally see myself there, I had, you know, vision, casting, and affirmations all around this home, and the way that it felt there and everything else.

But also something about it always felt kind of out of reach or weird. And I can see that more clearly now. But it didn’t work out. And we ended up where we are. And I know that that’s so much better. And it happened last time we shopped too before we bought the home in 2012.

There was the one that got away there also. And I remember all that feeling of loss, or oh, you know, if we had just bid higher, or if things had gone differently, or if they had been more ready to sell what all the different things. But at the end of the day, who’s the only person who can control you, right?

So processed that did a lot of tapping on the feelings that that should have been the home and it wasn’t, and all that kind of thing.

And then when we actually found our home and we bid on it, and our bid was the offer they accepted, and the process was all moving forward. Well, that’s when stuff really gets real.

That’s when you know, you really start to feel that commitment to that, that home that you’ve chosen. And all sorts of deadlines start to come together and the stress can really really mount again it’s all happened in 10 and a half weeks. Like those weeks.

I can’t even describe you at some of those days look like the To Do lists, things that got accomplished the phone calls that needed to be made.

The coordination with mortgage companies and all the different inspections and insurances and things that need to get set up. It’s a lot. In the midst of it, trying to manage the kids, luckily, it was summertime. So we didn’t have the school schedule.

But we were moving right as they were going back to school. And it was virtual Sylvan. So again, we were looking for a home that had space for them to be in school virtually, for me to work virtually for them to be able to be outside more, and for us all to just have spaces in places to call our own.

And we had so many problems, structural issues, things that broke like, it’s a calamity, to tell you all the things that happened. Before we moved in, we came for one of the walkthroughs. And there was literally a waterfall in our basement. It was raining outside.

Thank goodness, it was a rainy season. And it’s so many of these things were exposed before we moved in, although a lot not until after we moved in.

Many things can go wrong. And when that’s happening, you’ve got to get the energy right in yourself. Because it can really be a downward spiral where it’s almost like you’re manifesting these things.

Instead of having faith and leaning into what can possibly go right. It starts feeling like everything’s going wrong. And that’s not a good place to get into.

And there can start to be a lot of blame and resentment and feeling of Gosh, that I made the right decision or whatever. I mean, I remember watching the 80s movie The Money Pit during the first week that we were here just because it was so very parallel. So very parallel.

We had storms the first week, and tornadoes and things that came through the area, we had a tree fall on our roof. We had, we have this ravine around our house, it’s gorgeous. We had part of our yard fall into the ravine the first week we were here because of drainage issues that hadn’t been addressed.

There were so many things that went wrong, I tell you what that like all the work that we’ve done like it’s it’s like a brand new home. It’s great, but it was a lot to process.

And my point is, is that tapping got me through it. I remember saying to my agent on several occasions to saying how grateful I was that I was going through my master EFT training while all the calamity and chaos of home selling and home buying were going on.

Because I really don’t think it would have turned out as well as it did if I hadn’t been because there was so much up in the air. And not everyone around me was in the same place of being able to harness their energy. Not mentioning any names.

But I had a lot more to manage than just my own energy. And every day, for weeks, there was just something new and unexpected. That kind of landed something new to mitigate and resolve. And it really was a period of time that was very much like living in survival mode, which I often talk about.

That’s not the way we’re intended to live. It’s not how our bodies, our minds or spirits are intended to function. And it’s not how anybody really wants to live at the heart of it.

You know, we’ll say we’re managing we’re getting by whatever but when we’re living in that constant fight or flight mode, it will wear you the F down quick, really well.

I learned so much. I remember that was the year that I was like you know 2020 lt ever learned more than I didn’t that year between the stuff that I did to uplevel my coaching with the EFT mastery, the selling the buying all of the things I learned about how
through all of the problems that we had, and so much more, there was so much that happened in 2020.

Obviously, the pandemic and all the lessons learned from the emotions and feelings happening there. Wow, like, what a year. Anyway, if you’re going through the process of building a home, buying a home, selling a home, or just thinking about any of those things, I highly recommend bringing EFT tapping along with you for the journey. Because all of those processes are intended to make your life better.

They’re all intended to improve something, and give you more control, and make you happier, and give you a home.

A home should feel good. A home should be comforting. And however, you want your home to be. It’s really, really hard to create that. If you’re bringing along feelings of not being safe, and not being secure. Or things being out of control, or everything is stacked against you, or whatever else… I’ll tell you what…

Those feelings can come up fast in any of those scenarios.

So if I can help you at all to navigate the waters of home buying or home selling, or if you’re a real estate agent, and you need help with that, because honestly managing clients in the process of buying and selling a home. Like I feel like agents and buyers need therapy through the process.

And I also feel like EFT is the best therapy for all parties involved in the process of changing homes, whether you’re upgrading or you’re going smaller, or you’re moving because you have to, or you choose to, or whatever, there’s so much wrapped up in that that is inner work, guys, even though a home is a physical structure, there’s a lot of inner work, a lot of emotions tied to it. And a lot of things to work out, it’ll come up for you.

You know, maybe you had to move in your childhood. I know I did, I had to leave the home that I absolutely adored in my childhood. So a lot of that stuff came up for me as I got ready to bring my children to a new home and everything, everything interweaves. And if you don’t
unpack it every now and then examine it and allow the consciousness to come to you.

It’s not going to be pretty. And I’ve never known a better tool for getting conscious and being able to do things with those revelations that come up as you increase your consciousness and the Emotional Freedom Techniques.

If you have questions about how you could apply this to whatever you’re going through in a process like this, please comment and reach out to me I would be more than happy to give you insights on how to use tapping for home buying home selling home challenges and give you some help there. Because I know that would have been so incredibly valuable to me and so welcome when I was going through everything with my last home sale and purchase.

And I am always happy to receive your messages. If you want to send me an email at [email protected].